Letter 19
My Dear Friends, the images and stories of suffering in the world can move or upset us for a time. But they’re far away from us, removed. We cannot hear the moans or see the distress up close. We can always change the channel if this far-away suffering disturbs us. Doctors and nurses and carers are the exception to this, of course. It is almost intolerable, even to think about what they have to face every single day – the world over - in Coronavirus critical care units or in the corridors of makeshift hospitals where some of their patients will wait – some never to be treated. How horrifying…and hard… humbling! I think I’ve got it bad!
But in my experience there is nothing worse – nothing more heart-breaking - than watching your loved-ones suffer – and not being able to do a single thing about it. You feel it deep in the gut. Tears of sadness and anger sometimes mingle with fear and worry to name but a few of the emotions we might go through. Sometimes you just might bellow at the sky or shake your fist in sheer frustration at the Great Unseen One who, in spite of your constant pleadings, seems to have gone into hiding. Gladly, as the mother of a sick child, you would take it away… in a heartbeat… you would take all that child’s pain upon yourself to give the one you love just an hour or a day’s respite. Love – if only it could - would probably swap places gladly with the object of its affection – if only the Lord do what I say! It’s not too much to ask for Lord, surely! We lament along with the prophets and preachers and the people down through the ages.
Suffering. Injustice. Pain. Evil. They’re the great mysteries of life and they pose perhaps the greatest challenge of all to our faith in a loving God. Faced with these realities many have turned away from God. Some - in their time of need - have done the opposite and sought God’s face in the midst of their suffering. No-one ever regretted taking this course of action. It makes me think about how it must be for God to watch the world he loves so much in its great suffering – innocent or self-inflicted suffering. He must weep. In the week before His crucifixion Jesus stood and looked over the city he loved. “Jesus wept!” (John 11:35)
It was nearly 25 years ago (in Stevenage) that I walked into one of my first 12 Step Meetings. At the end of the meeting a kindly man seeing doubtless my confused novice-looks gave me a shiny business card which I promptly popped into my pocket. Later I looked at it and found the poem, “Footprints”. Even before my conversion to Christ the poem brought me such assurance. Maybe there was someone up there watching over me, someone who cared and would provide. It was in those rooms that I first discovered the Lord who had been there, right with me, through every single moment – much of it pretty awful. I discovered the Christ who not only suffered and died for my many sins way-back-when, but the Christ who sits at the sickbed and weeps with those who weep…the Christ who personally saved me…the Christ of love and mercy…the Christ who lifted me up and carried me through all the years…the Jesus who has promised never to drop me. I suppose, maybe like you, I just need reminding of this from time-to-time! And, when I am reminded of the Great Very-Present Presence, I repent of my mistrust. I often find my own troubles a lot easier to bear. Then it becomes just a little easier to sit with the suffering of those who are near to me and even those I do not know. How can I intercede for others unless I can feel something at least of the pain and suffering in the world?
In all their suffering he also suffered, and he personally rescued them. In his love and mercy he redeemed them. He lifted them up and carried them through all the years. (Isaiah 63:9)
From Mark and Susan (July 22nd, 2020)